"free"dom's ring

I finally succumbed to the poor college student stereotype....

Yesterday, while perusing campus, I saw a line of students--that can only mean one thing: free stuff. At first I scoffed, but for college students, "free" is the equivalent of the universal law of gravity. "There is no defying its power," I thought to myself as my feet shuffled toward the mysterious magnetic draw.

I stepped in line. It turned out that this was an ROTC event. After the history major behind me got the schpeel about how he could "make history" if he joined the army, I knew my turn was rapidly approaching. This was the pick up line: "You look like you're pretty physically fit." I laughed for the following reasons:
1)I've excericsed once in the past 2 months
2)The army just hit on me.

I politely told him I wasn't interested in being in the military and he handed me a card and mumbled something like "Enjoy your hotdog." So THAT was what was at the front of this horrendously long line. Yes. I still stayed in line. Pathetic, I know.

To bide my time, I directed my physically fit eyeballs toward the stick figure twenty-somethings rocking girl pants (better than I do, I might add) and generic power chords. Did I mention it was free? If nothing else, their acrobatics while simultaneously pounding the guitar were certainly noteworthy.

Eventually, getting my hotdog and BigK soda, I sat on the grass and smiled.
Here I was, enduring the solicitation of my service in something I am not interested in, listening to music I don't care for, and eating really junky food all in the name of "free."

Then I shuttered as I imagined how dull my life would be if I lived for sanity's sake, and voraciously consumed another bite.