re-attaining belief

i once had a friend, who when i asked her why she didn't do something she really wanted to do, said something to the effect of "i'm like that shy girl, who has always had this deep desire to be a ballerina, but never told anyone. she bought a pair of ballet slippers, but leaves them hanging in her closet. she tries them on once in a while, but only with the door shut, and even then, she doesn't dance."

it surprised me to hear her thoughts--almost certain of the unattainability of her dream. it seemed so shockingly dismal. years later, she is now doing that something she so desired, and doing it well. i marvel at her. i am proud of her.

this old conversation came to me this past week. i had almost forgotten it deep in the caverns of time, but i'm glad it found me. it reminds me that i can wear any of the shoes i've ever imagined and then have faith that they don't have to exist solely in my imagination anymore. when had i become such a disbeliever?

i like the expression "take heart," but i like it better written as "take, Heart." An invitation. i've been so afraid of the unattainability of my little and large goals,--afraid of the necessary initial self-indulgence. but the risk is well worth taking. how much it may eventually give!

i've got some dancing to do. i want to wear the soles of my dreams thin with belief.